Not to brag, but I partied with Chelsea Handler for her 50th birthday in Boston a couple weeks ago. Well, I bought a ticket to an event for her new book “I’ll Have What She’s Having,” but it still counts…at least in my delusional mind and as noted in my diary. When I say partied, I drove an hour and a half just outside Boston, took the T in, walked a mile to Brookline Booksmith (279 Harvard St), was handed a pre-signed book (there’s nothing better than getting yourself a gift for someone else’s birthday), and got twenty seconds with Chelsea while getting a pic snapped. The interaction went like this:
Me: Thanks for coming out and doing this.
Chelsea: Thank YOU for coming out.
Photographer: Next!
Girls night out!
In 2010, I attended a signing for her book “Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang.” Photos weren’t allowed but she did offer to sign any of her older books. I bought “Are You There Vodka, It’s Me Chelsea” for a friend since it’s one of the, if not the, funniest book I’ve ever read. When Chelsea unexpectedly personalized it to me, I gifted it to myself. The only thing better than getting a gift for someone else’s birthday, is getting yourself a gift when attempting to do something nice for someone.
“I’ll Have What She’s Having” is a compilation of essays shining a light on Chelsea’s day-to-day life and her gratitude for her wealth and the experiences it affords her. Much of the book is based on the lessons Chelsea has learned through therapy, making it feel a bit like a self-help book for millionaires. How to handle going to Jane Fonda’s house for dinner when she’s pissed at you, preventing family from encroaching on your personal space by downsizing from your six-bedroom mansion, and improving your mental health by buying a chalet in Whistler to spend two months getting high and skiing. Pro Chelsea Tip: If you don’t know how to ski, hire a hot instructor with benefits.
My favorite chapters are when Chelsea makes me laugh out loud, especially when Chelsea is horny during the pandemic. I love her attempts at trying to bed, then mayor, Andrew Cuomo. Also when most people were buying bread makers or crochet needles, Chelsea took safe-sex to a whole new level, buying a Cue Health COVID testing kit to test possible love matches before inviting them into her home. While waiting a whole half hour for the results, Chelsea would get turned off by the guys, and send them home in a way only Chelsea can…sorry, no spoilers here.
In my gay opinion, “I’ll Have What She’s Having” isn’t as humorous or relatable as some of Chelsea’s earlier books, which is disappointing but it has it’s moments. However, if I want to experience rich people overspending, I’ll watch The Kardashians and if I didn’t seek psychiatric advice while Dr. Ruth was alive, I’m sure not looking for it now.
